By Katie D. Smith
KotaPress Co-Editor

Sometimes we just need a little reminder in how we can be kind to ourselves and those close to us also grieving the loss of our children. Here are some thoughts that I put together to share here. If anyone else has any ideas, please feel free to share as well. And if anyone has any questions or needs extra help with support, please don't be afraid to ask. I'm here to assist as we all are in any way possible.

1. It's important for us to recognize that the holidays and other special days like birthdays and vacations & other celebrations will never be the same since losing our children. By doing things a bit differently, changing traditions and creating new ones can certainly help with surviving such moments in life.

2. It's okay to want to be alone, but don't completely shut yourself out from those that offer support and care for you.

3. This holiday weekend and other significant days may affect other family members. Share your feelings, thoughts and discuss plans as a family. Remember to respect other's choices and needs, and compromise if necessary.

4. Avoid stress and decide what you really want to do and what can be avoided.

5. Accept that your functioning may not be up to par.

6. Acknowledge emotions as they arise. Allow yourself to cry or talk things through as you need to.

7. Seek out others that will listen.

8. Consider other forms of self expression through means of art, journaling, music and poetry.

9. Exercise regularly, eat healthy, and try to spend time outdoors in being active (walking, gardening, reading, swimming, horseback riding, hiking, pic-nics, etc.). I always enjoy also taking drives out in the country to get away from the craziness of the city.

10. Try to maintain your day to day routine.

11. Reflect upon, reprioritize or perhaps simplify your life.

12. Volunteer somewhere to make a positive difference.

13. Reach out to others, support a relief effort.

14. Remember to always give yourself permission to do what is comfortable for you.

I hope these ideas are helpful as you start to do your own self-care!
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